Protect Judge Júnior

The Need For a Judicial Protection Program

There are rumors that right-wing Catholic and Evangelical radicals in Brazil and other countries are considering abducting this distinguished Judge, whose name is (The Honorable) Judge Júnior da Luz Miranda, of the 2nd Criminal Court of Jales, São Paulo.

We cannot allow that to happen. This is a call for a Judicial Protection Program, in order to safeguard the Rule of Law in Brazil, and the West more broadly.

Parenting 101

The controversy - (The Honorable) Judge Júnior issued a moderate parenting corrective to a (by the looks of it) white supremacist “traditional values” (i.e., Fascism) family, see below:

The decision isn’t readily available, at least in English, but what is clear is that (The Honorable) Judge Júnior made a call, based on his interpretation of the law and how a family should operate and children be raised, and now radical Catholic and Evangelical “Traditionalists” on the internet (mostly Twitter) are attacking the concept of the Rule of Law itself.

Now, to be clear, it’s not that playing piano, speaking Latin English and Portuguese, or liking Christian music is necessarily bad. And reading 30+ classics a year is unquestionably good - after all, where would we be without To Kill a Mockingbird, Night, and The Handmaid’s Tale?

Nor do you have to wear yoga pants and a sports bra everywhere you go, but if you can’t at least sometimes do so, or at least show us some knee, then obviously something is very wrong and you clearly need to spend at least some time in prison ((The Honorable) Judge Júnior’s ruling of 50 days seems entirely reasonable) doing diversity training and listening to funk music.

Like, it’s actually not that hard to integrate into modernity and fit in with the rest of society - If you’re a woman, literally just be a whore1 or a Badass Boss Babe - or both!2 And if you were unfortunately assigned male, either fix that, go be gay somewhere, or idk, how about just go kill yourself?

Right Wing Radical Hooligans

Now, as we all know, “it is emphatically the province and duty of the judicial department to say what the law is.”3 Judges, therefore, cannot be made to be afraid of exercising their legitimate authority into the family life of Brazilian subjects, as many on the online right are attempting to do.

For example, it would be particularly damaging to the Brazilian justice system, and that of the West more broadly, if Right Wing Hooligans were allowed to literally wake this man up in the middle of the night, drag him from his house and away from his family, and put him in a cell for 50 days to make an example of him.

This shocking suggestion is beyond the pale - That would essentially equate faithfully saying what the law is (emphatically the province and duty of the judiciary)4 with the criminal actions of the parents under his authority and jurisdiction!

Some are even saying he should be led in chains through the streets of São Paulo on a ritual humiliation walk, pelted with tomatoes until he reaches the public square and offers his resignation on his knees, as if Game of Thrones was cool or something.

A Call to Defend The Rule of Law

Now, I’m not really sure what the solution is, but I start from the principle that we clearly need to defend the Rule of Law and protect the Least Dangerous Branch.5 The Legislative and Executive branches must step in and do whatever it takes to ensure (The Honorable) Judge Júnior’s safety:

As my first suggestion, it goes without saying that the Executive Branch should not enforce (The Honorable) Judge Júnior’s order,6 in order to maintain some semblance of order and not to further provoke the Right Wing Hooligans into carrying out their online threats.

Next, since the order won’t be enforced, the Legislative Branch should probably rewrite the law in order to save face, so that we can at least say the Rule of Law is being upheld.7 But beyond this, more may be necessary to defend the Rule of Law.

In order to ensure (The Honorable) Judge Júnior’s safety, the Executive Branch should next surround his house, his person, and his family too, day and night, with 100 armed guards, to make it clear to everyone that the State (and more importantly the people) stands behind its (honorable) judges and the Rule of Law.

Finally, since there are probably constitutional difficulties with simply eliminating (The Honorable) Judge Júnior’s judgeship or deporting him (for his own safety) to a third-world cesspit, The Legislature could relocate his judgeship, temporarily or permanently, to a safe location - perhaps a secure island in the Caribbean, a secure facility in Central America, or a remote location in either Africa or India. The Executive could then facilitate this relocation, sort of like a Witness Protection Program.

Again, I’m just spitballing here, but the problem of Judges and the decline of the Rule of Law is clearly a serious problem spreading across the West, and we have to come up with some solutions here, or else nothing will stand in the way of us losing Our God-Given Civil War Won Constitutional Rights.